I realised some people really really cannot accept constructive feedbacks. This is crucial if you want to earn ppl's respect and to improve yourself. Especially at the management level, the ability to digest comments and take it from there will benefit not just himself/herself, but also the whole working team and even the whole organisation.
Sigh.
That will only happen in an ideal situation.
Everyone is opened to constructive comments and feedbacks, no personal attacks allowed.
However, this kind of ideal situation does NOT occur everywhere.
AND it is definitely not in my department.
Things did not improve after the discussion the other day, in fact, the situation gotten from bad to worse. All of us do not talk to her unless necessary, she will just pass us the things to do and assumed we'd know what she wants to do or what was the instruction given by the higher levels. She would just say 'you coordinate for this/that/blah' or 'do everything'. There is an increasing level of 'bo chap-ness' in her now, if she is not IC of that particular job, she doesn't even look like she care about the updates during team meeting.. and we felt like she is jus waiting for the time when we will get into trouble for not following the instructions given (since it wasn't clear from her and it's very vague what we were supposed to do).
A time-bomb ticking nearby...
The sarcasm in her tone even spreaded to people from other dept or even the cleaner. For instance, the item from an auction has been delivered to the office before packing and send over to the owner. The cleaner merely said "wah so pretty".. And she made a sarcastic remark in return "of cos la, very expensive leh, $**K leh!". I mean, u do not have to make the cleaner Aunty feel tt she is poor and couldn't afford the item right?! Your moodiness should not vent on other people. Then later the day, another colleague was curious and asked who bid for the item, she said "some kind soul lor" and gave a very irritated face (like, 'stop being so KPO la you' face). This colleague is slightly chubby, and said "the owner must be very slim.. Blah blah" and yet she can still sneer rudely in agreement. Oh my TIAN!
I do not know whether she did it on purpose, or she is really immature for her age + designation. We registered for a course as a team, but due to limited slots, we have to split into 2 groups. My colleague and I wanted to go to the first class, and the other colleague doesn't mind going to the second class. She WANTED to go to the first class, but sadly we took up the slots earlier than her. SO, she wasn't happy and forwarded the email to our boss to make the decision. Luckily boss said this is a small matter and we shld decide on our own... THEN she insisted to draw lots to who goes to which class. (THINK, CHILDISH? at the age of 40+, want to fight with 2 'kids' at half her age...). The other colleague mentioned he does not want to draw lot and willingly give us the 2 slots for the first class :D (*Thank U to uuuu!). HENCE she has no choice but to keep quiet and showed us the SUPER BLACK FACE. Seriously cannot take it..
Dark clouds seemed to be looming above our heads every day, especially dark and heavy + lightning seemed to strike anytime in the morning. Ignore greetings from us, always pull on a long face (now, who is the more EXPRESSIVE one? p.s. will talk about this 'expressive' thing in the next post)
I kinda regret being so opened to discussion and feedback about her and stuff earlier this week. But seriously my colleague and I could not take her bossiness (to the MAX) and unreasonable-ness when she is stressed at work.
I do not know how much longer I can tahan this kind of rubbish from someone at the managerial level, see more than 8 hours from Mon to Fri, 4 hours on Sat...
I guess all I can do is 忍 and do my part, ignore her and still do my part.
FML....
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
MSN honeys!
I am glad to have these 2 honeys to brighten up my day today!
Number ONE:
My cute little sister is always there to be my listening ear and supporting me + bitching with me!
THANK YOU DEAR! :D
Number TWO:
AND my MUSHY colleague! omggggggg!!! so sweet laaaaa... HAHAHAHA
:)
Reality is not as pretty as it seemed.
The last post was dated in May, which was when i've just started work.
It's Sept now, almost 5+ months of work..
Indeed, reality is not as pretty as i thought.
It is not the fairytale land that i've imagined, it is not a place where angels roam.. There are devils lurking in the dark, evil creatures crawling behind your back, and dangerous obstacles waiting for you to fall into.
I was very excited after graduation. "FINALLY! i can earn money and pamper my loved ones, daddy can semi-retire, and i can spend my own hard earned cash on my pretty pretty clothes/accessories..." I forgot to tell myself something that daddy has been constantly reminding me of. I need to learn to be more wary of people especially since im stepping into the working society. He was always worried abt me, cos i'd always naively assume everyone is nice, not evil; won't hurt me... aka [没有防人之心].
Initially i thought daddy was just being over-anxious cos i have helpful bosses and friendly colleagues. But slowly, i agreed with him.. i discovered these are just smoke screens. I've seen the ugliness of human beings, resort to do anything just to claim their worth, or to make u seemed worthless. Though my 'sights/experiences' are still shallow, it has already scare me. They will claim credit they did all these (when it wasn't actually done by them) if the outcome is postitive; or push the blame to you (me) if it is negative. "Thanks" for these learning experiences.. Or they can twist and turn their words in front of higher authorities just to make themselves look better or cover their mistakes.
I used to talk abt my personal issues to them, but i found out sometimes, colleagues are just colleagues. They can never be your friends in life. So i reduce the amount of stuff i reveal..
I did not want to let my parents/bf know abt me being upset too often.. cos it hurts me to see them worry. But i m the EXPRESSIVE and EMOTIONAL type of person, who doesn't like to hide my feelings, so i always blurt out the truth to them. I m true to my feelings and am not the kind who will smile at you but deep down inside disliking u.
Last Wed, i finally broke down over dinner with mummy. Treatment at work by a particular person was terrible (spare the details here). The tears has been accummulated for weeks and they finally overflow. Mummy asked me to quit my job if im really unhappy, she said it breaks her heart to see me cry... but i didnt want to. I do not wan to be seen as a weakling (to show the bully that i've lost/cant take it anymore), irresponsible person (to leave my job half-done when things are piling up) or to be a quitter. Daddy taught me how to change my mindset over these, and it calmed me a little [if not, i m very tempted to give that person a tight slap for being such a *****!].
I HATE BACKSTABBERS, HYPOCRITE! In fact, i think they are just cowards who do not dare to talk to you face-to-face over the matter. My colleague felt exactly the same way towards that person, and i wanted to be more open to discussion, so that the situation can improve.
Instead of confronting the person, i informed/feedback to the person gently that we hope to change this/that/etc to work better in the future.. Little did i know this person called my colleague and confronted her in a very harsh tone.. and even feedback to higher authority regarding this issue though it can be solved between us. We will be seen as being 'defiant' to superior if we said too much too detailed, or to be seen as finding problem out of nothing if we keep our mouth shut. Either way will make my colleague and i look bad isn't it?
Up to a certain point of discussion, both of us gave up explaining and let the opposition take her stand/let her deny the facts we said, even if the facts were incomplete. We just have to accept it.
Through this experience, I know i've to keep certain views to myself, to accept that this is the working reality and just do what i've to do. To learn to control my expression and emotions, be cautious of what comes out of my mouth and to be careful of my back every now and then.
Working everywhere should be the same, if not worse (i heard). So i guess i jus have to learn and grow to customise myself to fit into the working society. I'll just do my part and NOT let anyone has the opportunity to stab me for not doing my work [which i have been dutifully fulfilling my task laaaaaaaa, just in case u know. tsktsk..]. Thankfully i have my family/bf/friends and some colleagues who will stand by me, if not i would not know how to survive.
Felt better now after ranting. Thanks for listening, my dear blog. :) I'll be back soon.
*Identities are kept secret to protect myself from any further disputes. HAHAHA!
CIAOS!
It's Sept now, almost 5+ months of work..
Indeed, reality is not as pretty as i thought.
It is not the fairytale land that i've imagined, it is not a place where angels roam.. There are devils lurking in the dark, evil creatures crawling behind your back, and dangerous obstacles waiting for you to fall into.
I was very excited after graduation. "FINALLY! i can earn money and pamper my loved ones, daddy can semi-retire, and i can spend my own hard earned cash on my pretty pretty clothes/accessories..." I forgot to tell myself something that daddy has been constantly reminding me of. I need to learn to be more wary of people especially since im stepping into the working society. He was always worried abt me, cos i'd always naively assume everyone is nice, not evil; won't hurt me... aka [没有防人之心].
Initially i thought daddy was just being over-anxious cos i have helpful bosses and friendly colleagues. But slowly, i agreed with him.. i discovered these are just smoke screens. I've seen the ugliness of human beings, resort to do anything just to claim their worth, or to make u seemed worthless. Though my 'sights/experiences' are still shallow, it has already scare me. They will claim credit they did all these (when it wasn't actually done by them) if the outcome is postitive; or push the blame to you (me) if it is negative. "Thanks" for these learning experiences.. Or they can twist and turn their words in front of higher authorities just to make themselves look better or cover their mistakes.
I used to talk abt my personal issues to them, but i found out sometimes, colleagues are just colleagues. They can never be your friends in life. So i reduce the amount of stuff i reveal..
I did not want to let my parents/bf know abt me being upset too often.. cos it hurts me to see them worry. But i m the EXPRESSIVE and EMOTIONAL type of person, who doesn't like to hide my feelings, so i always blurt out the truth to them. I m true to my feelings and am not the kind who will smile at you but deep down inside disliking u.
Last Wed, i finally broke down over dinner with mummy. Treatment at work by a particular person was terrible (spare the details here). The tears has been accummulated for weeks and they finally overflow. Mummy asked me to quit my job if im really unhappy, she said it breaks her heart to see me cry... but i didnt want to. I do not wan to be seen as a weakling (to show the bully that i've lost/cant take it anymore), irresponsible person (to leave my job half-done when things are piling up) or to be a quitter. Daddy taught me how to change my mindset over these, and it calmed me a little [if not, i m very tempted to give that person a tight slap for being such a *****!].
I HATE BACKSTABBERS, HYPOCRITE! In fact, i think they are just cowards who do not dare to talk to you face-to-face over the matter. My colleague felt exactly the same way towards that person, and i wanted to be more open to discussion, so that the situation can improve.
Instead of confronting the person, i informed/feedback to the person gently that we hope to change this/that/etc to work better in the future.. Little did i know this person called my colleague and confronted her in a very harsh tone.. and even feedback to higher authority regarding this issue though it can be solved between us. We will be seen as being 'defiant' to superior if we said too much too detailed, or to be seen as finding problem out of nothing if we keep our mouth shut. Either way will make my colleague and i look bad isn't it?
Up to a certain point of discussion, both of us gave up explaining and let the opposition take her stand/let her deny the facts we said, even if the facts were incomplete. We just have to accept it.
Through this experience, I know i've to keep certain views to myself, to accept that this is the working reality and just do what i've to do. To learn to control my expression and emotions, be cautious of what comes out of my mouth and to be careful of my back every now and then.
Working everywhere should be the same, if not worse (i heard). So i guess i jus have to learn and grow to customise myself to fit into the working society. I'll just do my part and NOT let anyone has the opportunity to stab me for not doing my work [which i have been dutifully fulfilling my task laaaaaaaa, just in case u know. tsktsk..]. Thankfully i have my family/bf/friends and some colleagues who will stand by me, if not i would not know how to survive.
Felt better now after ranting. Thanks for listening, my dear blog. :) I'll be back soon.
*Identities are kept secret to protect myself from any further disputes. HAHAHA!
CIAOS!
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
my perm job :)
I am sure most of you have heard about Thye Hua Kwan Moral Society, or seen the organisation's logo [the logo with 心 in the middle of the circle] during the flag days. :)
(check out http://thkms.org.sg/ for info)
If not, you should find out more about it now because I am part of this organisation now as Marcom Executive. :D
NOW NOW NOW!
HAHAHAHA!
Started work 1 day after my birthday this year, and so, it's 3+ weeks of work already. Initially the morning waking up part was torturous, since i've been waking up around 9am, after graduation. Getting used to waking up at 645am now, but the almost-1-hour bus journey makes me 'weak' every day. HAHAHA!
Stepping into the working life is something i've been looking forward to, since the start of the degree course. Now that i'm finally IN it, it wasn't that interesting afterall, except for the ka-ching $$$ every end of the month. I m part of the routine white collar workforce now - wake up, work, go home, sleep.... and repeats everyday. (T_T")
My motivation now is to earn more $$$ and save, so as to provide for my parents (filial jessica right? *BEAMS) and to save for my future too. SO, i should need at least another 20 years of working laaaaaa, considering the housing property and other expenses are so expensive now.
My office is at north bridge road (opp the Clarke Quay's reverse bungee, and near Funan IT mall). So if you are nearby, call me for lunch (1pm to 2pm)!
Anyhooo... i m glad that there isn't any politics in my department at the moment (or none that i know of, as of now?).. colleagues are working well together.
till then.
peace.
time to stone before i sleep, and wake up for work again tml.....
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
last 3 days of 2oo9
oopsey daisy!
it's been almost 2 months since i last blogged.
life has been quite busy. but i m happy!
after the flashmobs for Esplanade and HTC...
had to prepare for examinations, dance practices for performance, dissertation, pack my room, celebrations, and blah blah blah.
my FINAL exam for my degree is done.
time to complete the final dissertation, and i m done w sch... which means... i m stepping into the society now. need to start job hunting soon.
kinda looking forward to it, but friends have been telling me they missed school so much because working sucks. :( i wonder if i can get accustomed to the working life...?
will be having 2 performances in jan 2010.
*one @ Cineleisure 16 Jan for sch's roadshow...
*another for GOH - SM LKY! :D the other time (eve of national day 09) he couldnt make it for the event in e end, so hopefully this time he will be there. we practiced really hard the last time... and this time will be even harder! wanting to put up a great show. :)
it's the last 3 days of 2009.
been quite a fruitful year:
- found my special someone! awesome memories tgt. <3
- new baby cousin. :)))
- finally has a pet, after 55239417182 years of waiting.
- completed my studies. (except for final submission of dissertation)
gained a little bit of weight.errr. not tt gd to me.. but it shows how well my bf has fed me. HAHAHA.- made new friends. :D
- met up with many old friends - pri, sec, jc! even pri sch teacher, after 10 yrs!
- owns a personal digicam (was sharing w daddy previously. ALL THANKS TO MY BOY!)
- successful dance performances/flashmobs outside school. gr8 experiences.
may 2010 be a greater year ahead! <3
Saturday, October 24, 2009
HTC flashmob
flash mob @ raffles place.
for HTC new handphone launch event :DDD
we rock the place! woohoo!
Rem to catch us again @ wisma on 24 oct 2009, 6ish pm! :D
Esplanade Dan:S festival
flash mob for Esplanade Dan:S festival promo. :)
19 and 20 sep 2009 @ raffles city shopping centre
3 and 4 oct 2009 @ heeren shopping centre
17 and 18 oct 2009 @ vivocity
it's fun!
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